They say this generation has it easy, or that this generation is the generation of technology. And it's true; anyone around my age has had to teach their parents how to do something with a new phone, or on the computer etc. But we have all dealt with the same things these pass few years, the same hardships.
One of the worst things to ever come out of the internet is cyber-bullying. I had just watched a video by one of my favorite youtube people, Kandee Johnson, about all these rumors, and hate sites dedicated for hating her. And it's so so sad to think that it's people my age (or above or below my age) the one's who know how to use the internet to do such things, that they would sit there and enjoy spreading slander about someone they don't even know. It's disheartening to think that one bad phrase, or one bad picture can lead thousands of people to start talking about what a terrible person you are, or how you're so spoiled, or even that you're stupid for saying that. I'm guilty of thinking someone was an air head for saying something on a youtube video (it was forever ago and i even posted the video with comment about it) and that's not fair. It was one moment in that person's life. Even if she took the video down or edited that out, it would be out there for forever.
I didn't understand the extent to which mean words from an anonymous person could hurt until it happened to me. In high school, we had watched several videos on cyber-bullying and everyone's read the stories in the news about heartless, dark people bullying class mates over the web, and I always got that sick feeling in my stomach, that ache at the back of my throat at the idea that someone would ever think that those words were ever ok to put out there. It was just a comment on that honesty box thing on facebook. I had added that dumb thing when I first joined facebook, and had sporadically gone to look at it or change the "question". It was on a random chance I decided to look at it. My question at the time was "If I were die tomorrow, what would you say to me today?" just a kind of fun question, something I hoped would bring meaningful responses from my friends without them being totally embarrassed for being mushy, or funny or whatever. But this comment...it was just terrible. I thought I would puke at the words written there. They attacked everything about me. They told me that all my friends hated me, that I thought I was funny but just being loud and annoying. They said I would be terminally depressed if I knew how much my friends hated me, that I only thought they liked me. They said that people were just waiting for graduation to get away from, that everyone liked my twin sister better then me and that's why she had had more boyfriends. They just went on and on. I burst into tears. I had always thought of myself as a nice person, I'm not perfect but I had always believed that I put only the best forward. I had even been told I was fake and everyone hated me. I was told that my boyfriend is whipped and he doesn't even really like me and he probably cheats on me (mind you, these are different messages though). I had posted that original comment as my status, which yea may not have been the most genius move on my part, but when I had been torn that far down I didn't know what to do. I needed to know my friends didn't actually believe that.
It's like being nice isn't about just being nice any more, it's just viewed as being a front. And that makes me so sad to think that we can't just be nice any more without having ulterior motives. I like being happy, I like making people happy and making them laugh. I would die for any one of my friends. My boyfriend is the most amazing guy on the planet and I feel lucky even just knowing him. I have been a solid believer that whatever you put out into the universe comes back at you three-fold. So here I am putting out some love for all of you. Here I am putting out love for you to feel, so you can pass it on and just increase the love out there in the world. Ok, that sounds a little selfish, but the more love you have is the more love you have to get. Take this and give someone some love. The internet doesn't have to be a tool of hate and terrible things, but encouragement and love. I don't even care any more who those anonymous people were who wrote those things. If they're happy knowing they made me cry, fine. But I don't have to be happy with that. I can take what I have experienced and make sure no one has to know what that pain feels like. "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return." If you can just live like that, even for one moment the world would be so much better!
